CARMAGEDDON II: CARPOCALYPSE NOW WALKTHROUGH There's nothing like running over fat dogs and crushing mental patients against the wall with their own beds. Keith Pullin does all that and more, as he too, goes quickly round the bend PCZ #69, 95% Intro Most of Carmageddon II is fairly straightforward really; learn the tracks and kill inordinate amounts of innocent civilians. However, it's not all foot to the floor and blood streaks on the door. The missions can cause problems, and it's those stages we're concentrating on mainly here. So, belt up, and get a grip. MISSION BY MISSION WALKTHROUGH Group 1 The first three races before the mission act as a warm-up. The other cars are lightweight, and pedestrians and animals are abundant. Explore, get used to the car and remember: the more peds dead, the more time you get. Try and visit the bank; crashing into the vault rewards you with some top quality gear. If you fancy practising some high-speed manoeuvres, slip onto Beaver City's ample orbital. Rocky Too is a sprawling level with masses of tricks to try. Extra Power allows you to push massive rocks onto other cars, and the Wall Climber makes your tyres stick to any surface - ceilings and all. It won't take long to reach the Boulder Dash mission, and when you do - just take it easy. Tumbling over edges doesn't help time-wise, so just get round those bends. Try and aim for under a minute per lap. Oh, and you get no extra time for killing on missions. So don't bother - it's cruel and pointless. Group 2 At first it seems that the antennae are impossible to reach. That's utter rubbish, of course. Pick the Eagle Mk III (that's if you've accumulated enough credits to actually have a choice) and just follow the ramps - generally speaking they point in the right direction. Most jumps require a take-off speed of around 80mph. Hit the right rhythm, and bounce from one rooftop to the next like a rubber ball. This mission teaches you a very important skill, and that's the ability to control your jumping so you can land in very enclosed areas. As the game progresses, you will find, of all the skills, this is by far the most important. Group 3 The 'Home Sweet Groan' race takes place in Max's junk yard. In the middle of the stage is his home, and it's around here that you'll find plenty of contraptions to deliver swift death to your adversaries. Have fun, see who can be lured into Max's lair, and then nail 'em! The race in the quarry can be precarious as it's sometimes hard to find peds, and the other contestants bash you around quite badly. Try and make the most of the ample time bonuses, and power-ups lurking behind or on crates and boxes. Usually they're not too far from the actual circuit, so a small diversion is often worth your while. On the mission stage, loonies from a local mental home are on the loose. There are 22 patients in all, and you have to squish all of them. It's probably best to go for the larger groups first, and then pick up the stragglers later. We've marked their exact locations on the map, so it shouldn't be too much of a problem. As for those irritating mentalists on the roof, just bounce up to them with Kangaroo power-ups, or something similar. Group 4 There are quite a few handy power-ups near the start to help you on this mission, but by far the best antidote to this little predicament is the Solid Granite Car. It should be lurking just outside the glass-fronted building near the start point. When you've got it, head straight for the truck which should by now be charging at high speed directly for you. Go for the head-on collision, and you should seriously hurt him. He'll probably head off into the junk yard after that, so follow him, grab as many useful power-ups as you can, and keep twatting the life out of him. It's advisable to go for a vehicle other than the Eagle Mk III for all of this. The heavier the car, the more damage you inflict on your opponent. As long as you keep up a fairly relentless assault, the time limit shouldn't be a problem. Group 5 The 'In Cold Blood' mission is a toughie. The snow makes you slide all over the place, the track is hard to see, and most of the race takes place on the side of a mountain, meaning that most of the race is spent on a 90-degree angle. Well, you're halfway through the game now, so what do you expect? The best advice, as for most of the missions, is to just take it easy. Keep your speed at around a hundred miles an hour - any faster and you're a dead man. Always keep a beady eye on your mini map, making sure you never stray too far from the circuit, and avoid getting any big air. When it comes to the ski jump, try and hit the ramp at about 50mph: the car should stay level thus averting any nasty Eddie the Eagle-type landings. Stay out of the way of the many quarter pipes too, as they can really slow you down. The real trick to this stage is finding the shortcuts. The many hairpin turns give you ample opportunity, and if you look carefully you can see narrow passageways and crevices that your car can easily slip into. In terms of vehicles to use, go for something small and manoeuvrable, or maybe one of the large-wheeled machines on offer - at least then you can obtain some grip on the slippery surface. Group 6 The 'Runway Runaway' race can be full of surprises, especially if you head into the airport terminal. If you drive up the stairs there are some duty free shops, and on the roofs of those there are some power and armour bonuses. This group of races concludes with an excellent mission - it's pretty easy too. First of all, select a fast, agile car (something like the Eagle perhaps?) and simply belt around the fairground at top speed killing everything in sight. A lot of the clowns can only be reached through well-timed jumps: for example, the two on top of the tower in the middle of the fairground can actually be decapitated if you hit the take-off ramp at the right speed (around 100mph). Watch out though, some of the clowns don't die at the first attempt. They may be fat, but they're often quite nimble and sometimes glance off a bumper attempting to escape. Make sure you go back and finish them off, and only leave the scene of an 'accident' when dismemberment takes place. Group 7 There are only four air traffic controllers to kill on the 'Control Freak' mission, but look where they are - right at the top of the tower. It takes some practice, but it seems the only real way to reach these well-guarded enemies is to use the airport 'props' as ramps to jump up to the tower. If you're very lucky you can smash straight through the glass. However, another method is to find a Slaughter Mortar and fire into the control tower to kill them. Alternatively, grab one of those tail things and see if you can smash the windows with that. Of all the levels this one seems to be down to luck rather than judgement but, as always, if you improvise, you can't really fail. The time limit is the real enemy here, so don't hang about when you first start. Group 8 Solid Granite Car power-ups are strewn all over the USS Lewinsky. Use these to make short work of the gun turrets; any that are left over can be demolished by picking up the mutant tail thingy near the start. When the turrets on the top deck have been destroyed, head below deck as quickly as possible. There are more turrets here - wipe these out using the same technique. And surprise, surprise - the core of the ship can be despatched in the same way. When you've done all that head up to the top deck and kill the admiral. A medium-sized, tough car is needed for this stage because you're often caught up in explosions; anything small and defenceless will be annihilated in these situations, so make the right choice. Group 9 This is the first time you face opponents on a mission stage and they don't mess about. Their vehicles are massive and they know how to use them. Being rammed into one of the many cliff faces is a common occurrence here; so make sure you keep moving constantly. You can combat their tactics by selecting a fairly large car yourself; the only trouble is you have to decide how much speed you're willing to sacrifice, as the time limit is again tight. To destroy the oil wells, slowly drive into the nearby black boxes. The wells can be levelled in any order, but it's probably best to go for the ones in wide open areas first - wait until the field has thinned out a bit before heading off into the frantic zones. Group 10 The second race is superb. In true Blues Brothers spirit choose a fast car and set about confusing those feds. Try and get two or three to chase you around, pick up a Kangaroo power-up (or something of the that ilk) and then go flat out towards a brick wall and jump at the last moment. Any police chasing you crash into the wall and die. This hectic city stage is bursting with similar cunning tricks so don't be afraid to take let your despicable mind run riot. After the fun comes the horror - the final stage. This is probably the only really linear level in the entire game - and to be frank, it's a bit of a shock to find. Prepare for this stage by picking the fastest car available; after that the key to this stage is opening the blast doors. Basically, any canisters you see knocking around must be destroyed; blowing them up opens various blast doors around the silo. The first few are obvious; they encircle some kind of dome. But after that, they're not so easy to find, especially with the cruel time limit imposed. But follow the route, destroy everything you see and it all becomes apparent. All you need is speed and a good memory; master that combination and you complete the game. Well done. All you have to do now is wait for Carmageddon III. BOXOUT CHEATS Still can't do it? Luckily we have here a complete list of every single wacky cheat the game has to offer. If you can't cut it with these activated, you really haven't got a hope LAPMYLOVEPUMP Cheats enabled IWISHICOULDFLYRIGHTUPTOTHESKY Fly mode SMARTBASTARD Complete the race WETWET Bonus GLUGGLUG Mega bonus STICKITS Peds glued to the ground MEGABUM Giant peds TWATOFF Explosive peds CLINTONCO Hot rod FASTBAST Turbo peds SUPACOCKS Invulnerability TINGTING Free repairs MINGMING Instant repairs STOPSNATCH Timer frozen/time thaw WATERSPORT 1 underwater ability TIMMYTITTY Time bonus CLANGCLANG Bodywork trashed BLUEBALLZ Frozen opponents BLUEPIGS Frozen cops SWIFTYSHIFTY Turbo opponents PIGSMIGHTFLY Turbo cops MOONINGMINNIE Lunar gravity TILTY Pinball mode STICKYTYRES Wall climber JIGAJIG Bouncy mode MRWOBBLEY Jelly mode DOTACTION View peds on map FRYINGTONIGHT Ped electro ray WOTATWATAMI Greased tyres STUFFITUP Damage magnifier EYEPOPPER Instant handbrake ANGELMOLESTERS Immortal peds WHIZZ Turbo SUPAWHIZZ Mega-turbo LEMMINGIZE Stupid peds TAKEMETAKEME Suicidal peds PILLPOP 5 recovery vouchers BIGTWAT Solid granite car DUFFRIDE Rock springs BLOODYHIPPY Drugs RUBBERUP Gripomatic tyres GOODHEAD Peds with stupid heads STIFFSPASMS Mutant corpses LEDSLEDS Gravity from Jupiter EASYPEASY Slow-motion peds TINYTOSS Mini peds FURKINELL Turbo bastard nutter nitros HOTASS Afterburner DIDEDODI Mine shitting ability LIQUIDLUNGE Oil slick from your arse SKIPPYPOOS Kangaroo on command ZAZAZ Ped annihilator POWPOW Opponent repulsificator OOHMESSYMESS Dismemberfest XRAYSPECS Ethereal peds GETDOWN Groovin' peds MRMAINWARING Ped panic attack FARTSUITS Helium peds LARGEONE Pissed peds HIPPOTART Fat bastard peds BLOODYARTISTS Stick insects COWCOW Ped repulsificator OSOSTRONG Extra armour OSOFAST Extra power OSONASTY Extra offensive OSOVERSATILE Extra everything OSOSTRONGSOSTRONG Double extra armour OSOFASTSOFAST Double extra power OSONASTYSONASTY Double extra offensive OSOVERSATILESOVERSATILE Double extra everything STRINGVEST Max armour VASTNESSES Max power FISTNESSES Max offensive SKEGNESSES Max everything THATSALOTOFARMOUR Extra armour slot THATSALOTOFPOWER Extra power slot THATSALOTOFOFFAL Extra offensive slot THATSALOTOFSLOTS Extra slots all round STRONGBONES Bonus armour slots FASTBONES Bonus power slots NASTYBONES Bonus offensive slots LOADSABONES Bonus slots all round EVENINGOCCIFER Drink driving FRYFRY Ped flame thrower INEEDAPILL Ped Valium OYPOWERUPNO Power-up cancel BIGDANGLE Mutant tail thing BONBON Slaughter mortar GOTOINFRARED Cloaking device BOXOUT KILLING FIELDS Most of the time they seem to just leap into your path, but at other times you can't kill pedestrians for toffee. Here's how to make the most of your weapons Pedestrian repulsificator A giant spring that fires out of the car, launching any unsuspecting pedestrians into the air and far, far away. Opponent repulsificator Same as the pedestrian repulsificator, but it affects cars too. Can be a real lifesaver on the last few races (and on network games). Pedestrian flamethrower A ball of fire bellows out from your car and torches any surrounding pedestrians. Great for killing mental patients and clowns. Spiked ball and chain Take out a dozen pedestrians at any one time with this huge 'ball and chain'. It's also very effective on other vehicles. Pedestrian electro-bastard ray If you find a suicidal pedestrian power-up and one of these, you're in for one hell of a time. Pedestrian annihilator Similar to the pedestrian electro-bastard ray but available through the power-up inventory. Fry until you can fry no more.